My low point of the night was when my roommate spit out her jello shot and i took it...
Can the rest of this semester just go by as a montage?
i'm way too high for it to be safe that i just discovered i have a fire extinguisher
Sorry for eating those cheese fries out of your hands last night
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you got us kicked out of the restaurant for trying to pee in the trash can.
I'd just like to inform all involved that walking into a liquor store holding a milk crate at the beginning of a night as stock ends badly
Getting sick, pulled the filter off a camel crush and rolled it into my joint to clear my sinuses. If there were stoner awards, I'd receive one.
We had car sex in the parking lot of the dispensery while he blasted Tony Bennett. It was so fucking romantic.
Okay. So my choices are the sleeping Guy who looks about twelve and a man that looks like he was the original sandman. Im gonna need a beer for this......
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If we don't rescue him from the fat chick soon, she is going to eat him alive and suck the marrow from his bones.
Brunch got away from me. I might be a little high.
Never let me go online shopping while drunk. I now own 2 baby cribs. I have no children
OF COURSE I FUCKED HIM! Did you not read the part about him having red and green Christmas condoms?
I didn't have any lime for my chaser.. so after my shot I ate a handful of lime flavored chips. Didn't work so great.
Please god tell me you aren't pregaming your date alone.
Randomize