he promised me brunch in the morning so i felt like it was ok....i really need to get a job.
She jerked me off while she drove us back from Denver going 70mph. It was both the scariest and most erotic moment of my life.
i did the responsible thing and pissed myself...
Its really bad when you fall asleep at a stop light outside the hotel and you wake up to a small spanish limo driver knocking on your window to tell you it's a green light
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i feel like i got punched in the cervix. he's a little different in bed than i thought he would be..
She judged ME for picking my nose when SHE has the clap.
I was grinding on people that were grinding. Nonconsensual.
Ah that wonderful moment when you realise the bookmark you were using in a book you lent your mum is actually a receipt from a strip club
Saw the same Luigi I hooked up with last Halloween. Still in his same Luigi costume and scruff that hurt my face
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If we tried baptizing you I feel the water would start boiling around you.
Got robbed by an ATM. My weekend officially sucks.
He got an erection from helping me mobilize my lumbar spine. I love physical therapy school.
using my tits for other peoples nudes hit me up business in the making
He screamed, "Let there be light!" when he came
I got sriracha sauce on my mask while I was eating fast food, now wearing it makes me hungry
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