Coffee is gods way of saying go ahead, get absolutly trashed on weeknights, I got your back
IM SAVING ALL MY LOVE FOR YOU
I don't want it.
is there a reason why there is cup of piss in the fridge?
no
They just both started mumbling "i cant go home like this" "it's all over my face" "do you have extra pants?"
Its not monday til someone throws up in the hallway
6 margaritas later and free shots of tequila, i woke up with a fat lip and they said i blew my nose in a slice of bread
Dude, you bit through my nipple. Give it a week, damn.
Because i love you. And people show love by not letting their friends shit themselves.
Sadly he is straight as an arrow that is designed by a robot computer from the future with lasers.
This saddens me. Mostly because I want to see the schematics on that robot.
We got stuck in traffic in the tunnel while we were smoking weed. We were afraid to air out the car.
He couldn't get his dick hard. So he started yelling at it. " EVERYONE is laughing at you, you piece of shit no wonder you can't get pussy" i wonder if that happens frequently I'll try again next weekend
Yeah. I'm so over work, that I'm not even satisfied pretending to work anymore. I just flat out want to go home. Fuck this job
as a side note pls kill me
And now, by the power vested in me by the state of intoxication, I now pronounce you fucking awesome.
Remember how slutty I thought she was when we were freshmen?
Yeah! But that was a long time ago. Plus, you use your sluttiness for good!
Randomize
