her eyes looked like someone had poured fruit punch in them. needless to say we had a good time.
So then I sent a pic msg of the Magnum XL box to her friend
Just mixed Baileys and yoohoo. I feel like an alchoholic 2nd grader.
Throw up on the ground, people dancing to loud Bollywood music, seats literally missing. Fuck I hate public transit
Theres just something about looking at pictures of your dick in church that doesn't feel right
Whatever. I'm saving myself for my wedding night or a night with enough patron.
once you started introducing yourself as "running-bear" i knew you were beyond fucked up
May the one with the liver that just won't quit win
Doing a circuit workout and using a power hour playlist for my 1 minute timers. I am getting old. creative, but old.
Twist to Josh's story, he had a gyro in his hand and never dropped it even after he got knocked the fuck out
We were getting breakfast he shit himself in the middle of ihop. Mid bite he just yells out o fuck.
Sorry I crashed a riding mower into your garage door. No hard feelings??
Liquor has joined the party. Aly just fucking yelled "I LOVE COOKING" and poured margarita mixer, ice and tequila into the blender.
Whenever someone said no you would yell "Die Motherfucker." Kind of like some twisted drinking game.
THERE ARE NO EMOJIS TO SHOW MY SEXUAL FRUSTRATION
Randomize
