I discovered last night there is no graceful way to remove your face from your gf's crotch when your parents walk in the room
Ryan Ross and Jon Walker left panic at the disco today.
I predict a mass suicide of the 14 year old girl population...
You know ure stoned when u start thinking about making a bacon smoothie
Fucking Canada. At least when they wake up tomorrow they're still in Canada
oh no, im for sure still drunk. i wana eat evrything in the fancy feast commercial... everything
I just want him to slap me with his dick and call it love
And all I wanted you to do is stand there and sing who let the dogs out.
You act like pregaming preseason hockey is a crime. Come on man, get fucked up and watch pucks. It rhymes so well it has to go together. DOS EQUIS Y DEVILS!
I feel like fucking him is something we all do but don't want to admit to. like masturbating or peeing in the shower
I tried to talk to him, but he didn't recognize me at first. I had to show him the top of my head and then he remembered.
I used his number to look up his customer information at work. He's no longer saved as Magic Penis in my phone.
Sex in your truck helped me start regaining feeling in my jaw. Thanks!
I went down on her on the dining room table. That should count for something.
I was struggling morally, but once I let go, I came pretty hard.
I feel like I have the I just lost my virginity face and everyone at the grocery store knows it.
Randomize
