i just picked a peanut m&m up off the floor. with my toes. and then proceeded to eat it.
just saw a guy driving a atv down the highway in a tux.... only in Iowa...
I can't tell if your life is amazing or needs reevaluation when "did I get hit with a nightstick" is a legitimate question.
I burst into tears on the boat this morning because we bumped a duck in the head. I am way too hung over for today
I was trying to be quiet until started to feel like my cock was being dipped in a rainbow and then I stopped caring temporarily
Most senic walk of shame ever. This is why you go to school in Hawaii.
New hot neighbor boys moving in across from us...So i did the logical thing and bought two 30 packs up the hill and walked right by em. Consider the line hooked and ready to reel.
HURRY. I NEED DRUNK. MORE DRUNK.
It's probably because the lack of alcohol in your stomach. Alcohol kills bacteria. I am a doctor. Trust me
i'm hungover but need to study so i had a vodka orange juice, three ibuprofen and an adderall for breakfast. what up med school
I can't thank you enough for the well-timed blowjob. What a huge improvement in my outlook on the day.
Sex aside I am really scared about Syria...
My stripper pole led lights flash with the sound so it's awsome with music
So do I get to ride the beginning of the November stache or what?
Was so high at one point last night that while showering I was worried that using too much hot water would slow down our Internet.
Randomize
