I just wanted to let you know that if you dont tell me to stop texting i will still keep on trying, you matter to me
restraining order is on its way, crazy bitch
I need to go to a fraternity... my boobs are telling me to.
im like that movie w. ryan reynolds, no ones ever going to date me unless they're forced to marry me.
We are allowed to think Jacob from Twilight is hot in 468 days!
I don't know what is sadder, the fact that you figured that out or the fact that I can't wait until then!!
no, i'm not a lesbian.. i just really want to fuck you while drinking, thats normal in a friendship.
there was a 40 knocked over. chips and salsa all over the floor. and she was in her thong doing boot camp on demand in the middle of the room..
I just asked the dr if it was herpes while wearing my shirt from the strip club...
I told you to stay away from the strippers in Oklahoma
PS August 29 of last year was when you ran over my foot. Facebook just reminded me.
Wearing a shark mask, slugging tequilla, in cowboy boots, and not minding that my spandex is on backwards. What are you up to?
I'm shotgunning a 12 pack at a bus stop. This is why we pay the rent with an auto withdrawal at the beginning of the month
That's right. I did.
You are the saddest 25 year old gay man I've ever had the displeasure of knowing.
After 7 months of nothing.. shall we throw your vagina a party? as its reinstatement into society?
You are attracted to power and since you can't date the married old guy you have to go for the next best thing - his gay son
You gotta have 1 orgasm for me and the rest can be for you. I'm living vicariously through you 😂
We fucked on the roof... like that has to mean something
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