Tell your broad to take a big shot of 'chill the fuck out' and put it on my tab.
home. puking in laundry basket.
Just because it's been in my vagina doesn't mean it's important to me
ya, but you'll graduate college with a higher education. I'm looking at at least two addictions, an abortion, and a few weeks jail time.
Im down. Even tho your nick name intimidates my vagina.
I'm pretty sure we scarred one of our coworkers. This is the second time he has caught us both fully undressed and banging at work.
Either he has bad timing or he wants to join.
I just want to let you know how hung over I am today and I fucked a girl in a kangaroo costume last night.
That's awesome and prob the first time you had an idea of what to do. I'm super proud of you Chelz
Its cos im stoned ! My high self is maturing
I just found out that order of 30 Beefy 5-Layers last weekend has achieved legendary status among the Taco Bell employees. Is there a Stoner Achievement for that?
I told him I was going to sit on his face after I got out of the shower, he threw up the arm boners and yelled "STEVE HOLT!!" I might actually stop sleeping with other dudes.
We had an in depth conversion about the best way to take a dick pic. Both with and without mirrors.
Just introduced myself to a group of people and one dude said "You're Marc!? I've heard many a legend of you." I raised bottle of champagne, said cheers, and drank with them.
The man sent me a video of him doing the helicopter, the least I can do is go visit him in the hospital
I'm not complaining, but why is it that every time I hang out with you I come home with random injuries and random girls?
I fought off a bull with my bare hands while he went off to have sex with her against a wall. I’m more upset about the fact that no one is acknowledging what I did.
Randomize
