i don't care who i fucked last night, until im at 43plus im not considering myself slutty
Every good night starts with white castle burgers and shots in the parking lot.
ya and he came three minutes into it because he didnt have sex all summer
oh that makes more sense i knew you arent that good
How many times can I tell him I wasnt expecting sex before he realizes I'm just too lazy to shave all the time?
Its become more of a routine.. Whenever I get done eating and have left overs I just take it over to his house and throw it all over the walls and windows. Pay backs a bitch ehhhh
oh awks just saw the head of medical staff who I punched the bottle of wine at
Currently doing my walk of shame down a floating dock. No more guys who live on a boat EVER AGAIN
I just watched a guy smoke weed through a French Horn. He is my hero
Yeah I don't even know dude. This shit has reached new levels of ridiculous. Let's hope baby Jesus gallops down a rainbow on a sparkling unicorn and wills that bitch clean. I think that's the best chance we've got.
Well I just found the most comfortable way to pass out on my toilet if I ever have to.
Its a good thing to know for upcoming events.
BTW he text me to text him later after the concert to hang out. Im prepping my bed but I should know I shouldn't count my dicks before they hatch
I'm all dressed in my outfit from last night, and I'm not even the sluttiest person in Walmart right now. God bless Miami.
I think my teeth are moving, they feel like people.
i think i'm just going to start having sex with his brother, he's much hotter and it would definately be less illegal.
tell me about the eggs
Randomize
