We walked past a group of guys in front of a bar last night and they claimed, I quote: Wow, we'd actually have to work for that.
you insisted on breathalizing me with a inhaler.
i forgot beer had calories. that would explain alot.
Exactly. wat kind of friend would i be if i even pretended to give a shit about ur problems
So does it count as really great road-head if he ran over 3 mailboxes before realizing he was off the road?
I'm quite proud of this turning point from one night stands to giving some guy a BJ to fix my car for free.
Too long to explain. Basically I started an electircal fire. No one was hurt except for a box of cereal near the outlet.
the girl in my class has a rolling backpack and just told it to stay. im too hungover for this.
I am currently watching him baptize himself in a baby pool with a handle of belvedere while wearing a coral dress.
I want to have sex with him.
I WILL PAPERCUT YOUR URETHRA YOU DO NOT STEAL A MANS SECOND BIG MAC
The worst part about being a grammar Nazi is all the porn I skip over because the titles are misspelled
The only thing that got rode last night was the shit face train. I brought him home to see wht all the hype was about and he just started crying and puking in my bathroom.
So I just sneezed blood everywhere. On the upside. After yesterday I feel way more confident AND I give even less of a fuck.
Give me 20 minutes.. I'm going to need to start off with an orgasm to get through this day
I bet I give better head than any other PTA mom.
Randomize