The pirates hijacked 3 more ships today!!
we need a boat to join in
Obama is on top of it we'd get killed within mins, but we'd live in legend foreva
No, computers are like whores. moody bitches that cost too much and no matter how much protection you have you can still get a virus
she gave me one of her senior pics and told me specifically to give it to you. In other words she still wants to suck your dick.
It's shit like that that makes me wish being deaf was contagious
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'll be spending 4/20 on a cruise ship, so i need a babysitter to make sure I don't reenact Titanic
dude she looked like Newman from Seinfeld I'm done with this wingman shit
I sang Jenna happy bday in the middle of throw up hurls
Exactly. This is the bit where I learn a heartwarming lesson about not making my drinks half vodka
My boss just sent an employee on an hour long paid break to pick up weed for our 'staff meeting' tomorrow morning.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was eating leftover taco bell in bed at 3 in the afternoon. I can't throw any stones
Status: mom bitching about grandma not shutting the fuck up, while not shutting the fuck up. Dear Jesus give me strength or more bourbon.
Good, I don't think Coke dipped ring pops hold up in the mail anyway.
Woke up with a throbbing vagina and a lesbian in my bed. Then for the hell of it we had morning sex. Definitley bisexual now
who gets drunk at chipotle by noon and then gets kicked out? this chick.
I just spent 45 minutes and a really well-put together Power Point trying to convince her to use my dog as baby Jesus in her church's play.
Randomize