So my shaver died while I was trimming...ya know. And now it is half way done. I don't think there's currently any aesthetic in keeping it this way...
i just overheard my mom tell my dad he should drink less so he could hit the right hole
Was just grinding with my bio TA. She asked why i wasnt studying
Pretty certain he passed out for a while going down on me. Absolutely certain he passed out during the blow job.
You told me you were allowed to keep eating butter because it had just passed midnight and you were on the next day's daily fat servings
The last good decent convo we has was when I was trying to convince you to let me watch you pee.
Ye. Looking like it's about to be one of those mythical responsible weekends
I have migrated to the couch. Minimal movement is still happening, but I should be mobile enough to go to the liquor store by eight.......so that good.
I think I want to impress his gay best friend more than him..
2 hours later, she made her cat watch the waterfall scene from Homeward Bound to teach her how good she has it here.
For future reference. Do not congratulate the bar tender at oscars she is not pregnant she has just gotten fat u will get a shot thrown in your face
She brought me back a blanket from Mexico, then we had sex on it
I was not drunk. There was Star Wars, sex, and baby oil.
At one point she put on my dads pants and yelled after him EMILIOOOO! Dude, my dads name is Mark.
So just spent 30 minutes of my life talking to my cousins friend who told me she buys cocaine from a pizza place by asking for extra Parmesan
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