at some point to night u and I have a 'meeting' too...(1-737): I hope so
I took Valium worth by frank. I squabble
Li shadha you vin. It's phot out. I just ate a fried Oreo
I got fucking wesley sniped last night by that power hoe. How'd it end up on your end? Did you canoodle the stripper enough for her to agree to go to formal?
ha- omfg whatt the fuck is wrong w me. Alcohol+third cousins= bad decisions
The old woman next to me on the el smells like cupcakes...but she doesn't taste like cupcakes
highlight of my day: just saw a crying girl get dropped off at home wearing only socks, booty shorts, and a dirty wifebeeter. I wonder what happened to the costume...
i'm as serious about my hair as jesse from full house.
that is uncle jesse to you, show some respect.
First day at work... I clogged up the office toilet on purpose to assert my dominance.
You do realize that you tried to eat the neighbors cat because the dominos guy was 5 minutes late. You would have succeeded if we didnt stop you.
you called me in the middle of the night, wandering the streets, in search of "the ultimate burrito"
Three things I need a picture of: your friend, your bong, and your dick.
So the first 4 hours of my morning was equivalent to seeing under water. Things were starting to get better until I remember I drank mustard for free stuff and flossed my teeth with a strand of hair from a stranger in the bathroom.
oh and apparently my boobs are named "have no fear" and "plenty o'beer"
do you think eating a burger while having sex counts as multitasking skills?
dude. that's the chick that BIT MY DICK. it doesn't matter how hot you think she is, trust me man.
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