My mind says no, but my body says yes.
What does your body say about chlamydia?
Why did I wake up with "How to masturbate" on my youtube search bar?
You told us you forgot how, and started to cry.
Do you need a place to sleep? Cause I fucked in the guestroom a few weeks ago and never washed the sheets. But if you don't care neither do I.
Idk yet. Trying to convince him to get a phoenix bird tattoo first
Let's just say my vagina is not superimpressed with the superintendent of schools.
You missed me roundhouse kicking a lit glow stick out of a guy's mouth last night. You would have been proud.
My whole family just stopped to look at me and aknowledge how fucked up I am.
turns out putting a tie on my unicorn onesie didn't make it acceptable "formal wear" and I found salsa in my cup holder
Fuck me this girl I went home with has a cover on her remote control so there is no spills to ruin it. Imagine how many condoms she's going to make me wear
You also proposed and then tried to jack me off
I walked in to you guys using a milk jug as a gravity bong
Surrounded by smaller versions of the same
Hahahaha. He sent me a dick snap in the lululemon stockroom. What is life. If this works out, this could benefit everyone....
This is like the fourth time this month I've woken up hungover in someone's backyard
I climbed to the top of a stripper pole and touched the ceiling. Accomplishment?
I put him in the supply closet, used the copy paper to build a fort around him and his wheelchair, then he fucked me in the fort.
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