Manager just farted into the intercom. Whole place heard it. A number of people stopped everything and looked at him. Best. Night. Ever.
well since you're still married, you will be paying for my abortion right?
How did a couple beers and monopoly turn into a bottle of vodka and throwing eggs at eachother in the kitchen?
currently shading my boobs to make it look like i have mass cleavage...thanks art school
ride him like a prized pony all the way to orgasm town.
Bro, did you watch that scooby doo porn I sent to you?
He started screaming when he saw my dog. He thought it was a polar bear
Having boobs is probably the greatest thing in the world, free booze all around
Yeah I'd rather get obliterated at home.
Same here. I'd like to ensure that I won't get pissed on.
considering I just took 3 shots of fireball I don't think I'm coming back tonight. also the hulk just walked in crushing beer cans on his forehead
You have got to be the only man who has passed out while getting a lap dance.
Like either my tits got bigger or I've succumbed to Trumps tiny hand syndrome
She’s super into those renaissance faires. But, if you can’t actually stab anyone, what’s the point?
If by science you mean beer then YES!!!!
If you can wrestle my underwear off of me, you can top. It'll be like using an amulet in Legends of the Hidden Temple. Instead of not getting captured, you don't get fucked in the ass.
Randomize
