I will come over but only if I don't have to take my sunglasses off for it
I might be drunk enough to make out with you. You don't want to miss this unique opportunity.
Oh and discovery of the day is it's the channel, not the time on your cable box. Thought it was 2:16 for 4 hours
i woke up to my roommate spraying cooking spray on my legs. fourth time this has happened. not cool.
Just tried on my bathing suit for the first time this year. Had to drink a beer to numb the pain.
Green mimosas i think yes
I'm gonna have to fantasize about her dying just to get off.
I JUST MET THE GIANT MAN THAT WILL CARRY ME FROM PLACE TO PLACE
Cops said there's a crazy dude with a mask in my neighborhood. Don't get stabbed.
If he was naked that was me.
let's remember the whole point of NYE: to drink antisocial amounts of antisocial drinks, become incoherent, ruin a carpet, talk to a tree, wake up with head sellotaped to toilet. The where/how is superfluous, my vote goes to a cupboard and a bottle of jaeger Questions?
In another note. Thanks for making me get a vibrator. For real.
If he refers to me as slump buster one more fucking time.
You start to question your morals when you wake up at 430 and there's three people naked...that you don't no
You were so fucked you introduced me to a pile of Laundry
I wondered why I slept in the front room
Its like people have to train for months before they try and drink with us and survive...
Randomize
