She's perfect. Funny, gorgeous, 3 tats, been through a lot, bright. I'm in love.
One night stand!! Now I'm pissing excellence
That burning is chlamydia
I bet her clit looks like pig in a blanket.
when did my "fat clothes" just become my clothes...diet starts tomorrow
Yeah, all the sudden I heard a loud "ding" and realized I had been passed out on the dorm elevator for about an hour....
To celebrate your birthday last night, I got drunk and sang drift away in buffalo wild wings. Happy birthday. The entire bar sang the chorus with me. It was magical.
I dont know how to respond to your rave picture. I mean yeah, he's hot, but it just seems wrong to be like "Please tell me you fucked that guy with the pacifier!"
Fuck a-yeah! I just found a wine key. Let 'Don't Fuck With Me Friday' commence.
i just wrote an ode to an enchilada dorito. i'll need that pregnancy test now please.
the manischevitz sangria was a big hit
He's in the same dorm as me. We are sharing a laundry room, gym, and cafeteria. I'VE ALREADY COMMITTED DORMCEST AND MOVE-IN DAY ISN'T UNTILL NEXT WEEK!!!!
I had mdma, weed, and alcohol in my system. My doctor seems to think that's how I tore my groin.
Just so you know, I woke up with 2 oven mits in my bed and no clothes on.
I REMEMBER NUGGETS BEING THERE BUT WE WERE AT A TACO BELL
This may be the alcohol talking, but I'm pretty sure I know Spanish now
Randomize
