Mel Gibson is dating a 24 year old
You're not Mel Gibson and I'm not 24.
turns out I still hate jay leno...even at 10pm.
he conducted the entire waffle house into singing the song Oklahoma. He was wasted.
It's like alcoholism for beginners at my kitchen table.
He was carrying a rolled up carpet saying he was saving it for tomorrow's Walk of Fame.
He played a tape of his mad rapping skills after the final...his rapper name was Mad Stylz and he rapped about all the pussy he got in the 90's. I love Sociology.
I smuggled my gin and tonic out of the bar by shoving the glass in my pocket...mistakes were inevitable.
I'm Still in a robe trying to piece together 3-7am I'll be there in a few
So there I was praying he didn't go limp again, choking on a long, long gray ball hair. This is my Saturday night. This. Is. My. Life.
omg i just made best friends with a deer. Im like the drunk santa clause.
A guy just picked up ur brother and carfied him away singing and im slight concern
how early is too early to start drinking over the gilmore girls revival
The stripper was super into me until she pulled out my tits then I realized.... This bitch is just using my ass to get MORE TIPS
HE’S PUKING UP BLOOD
okay all good I mistook strawberita for blood...
i just sexted for my mom while she was driving, i have hit an all time low.
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