I'll probably hate you when I'm sober
Is drinking merlot and watching womens figure skating by myself gay?
Found a bar with a washer and dryer and they serve food. I never have to leave
Well there's nothing more unattractive them a naked, soft man crying
Oh good your over him
I wasn't concerned until I realized he was using the vase my birthday flowers came in as a " big glass" for his 151 and coke.
I keep telling myself that if Britney can make it through 2007, I can make it through this date.
Spider-Man is making out with Wonder Woman while Captain Kirk feels up Princess Lea. Nice to see nerd barriers broken down at Comic Con.
He cried & told me I reminded him off his mother. I don't want to talk about it. I want to drink about it.
Something about finishing sexting a guy and him going "well. I have to get ready for Passover now" really makes me rethink my life choices
You ever feel like just rubbing your face in everything like a dog?
I love the smell of your bedroom. It smells of a mixture of cherries, leather, and unrequited homosexual desire.
I just had a 30-minute convo with an irrelevant fuckboy from college who decided to tell me FOUR years later he’s sorry for sleeping with 3 girls at once including me.
You wouldnt listen to us when we told you there was no place that was selling girlscout cookies at 4:30am...
The cl.oudds are foaming a really big pen.Is OMG.
I saw that he had a tattoo of a map of New Jersey on his arm, so i slowed down to like 20mph and pushed him out of the car
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