id tell you what to do, but my morals dont exactly scream, "Listen to this guy!"
After last night's events, I googled "how to change your life direction." I found a really helpful ehow.com article.
I think the universe is against us being together. Or maybe it's just god's way of telling me there is a bigger dick out there for me.
Dude. Muppets take manhattan on netflix instant. Pass my midterm or relive my childhood? Tough decision.
You found Muppets From Space a little too intense, so you just sorta sat on the ground and stared at the wall plug for an hour and a half.
What's the appropriateness of putting a 50 cent lyric in my gmas eulogy?
I'll come out for a little. I can't be visibly hungover at work again or I get written up and fired. And yes, I am aware of how alcoholic that sounds.
I'm laying in bed with a case of beer,.. That's how this break up is going..
He's telling everyone that the only reason he's at this party is to hook up with me. SOS HELP.
I just told him he had gained a new brother. He immediately knew I meant the eskimo kind.
I thought I was invisible, then some guy flashed his high beams at me and I realized my lights weren't on...not invisible.
Dude we both faced 40s of steel reserve which is like saying, "Hey, I'm a complete piece of shit!"
He was super adorable, like I wanna pinch his cheeks while I fuck him...
It's Christmas. You could splurge on something a LITTLE fancier than wine in a box.
Well, the night started out with you ALMOST falling out of a tree. Then we went back to the tree after about 9 shots and you DID fall out of the tree.
Randomize
