dude i was like still drunk, taking pictures of her while she was naked and asleep and she woke up
haha what'd she say
i don't know man, something about us dating. but i never talked to her sober so i said i was making breakfast and snuck out of her house. close calls man WTF
I just remembered Dan asking me all polite in the middle of sex "do you mind if I get behind you?" that was the most polite way I've been asked to do it doggy style
There is an asian family here, I heard the mom call her son onyong
He went so fast i didnt even have time to pretend like i was about to have a fake orgasim
see you put your penis in her and it's like an ignition key to start the crazy
out of nowhere you said let us see your boobs, then proceeded to pull my shirt down.
i gets down
Today should be called shooting fish in a barrel day. Every place ive gone to ive met a girl who regrets not hooking up last night. There have not been girls this easy since Fathers Day
Either allow it in a formal toast or i will drunkenly tell your in-laws while i'm dancing on their table. either way, the truth is coming out
Well for starters, her tits were hairy.
My love will cover her like lulu lemon yoga pants. Casually supportive and always complimenting your Ass.
We are both federal employees and Obama gave us a four-day weekend to lie in bed. Do you know how many orgasms that will be? I knew there was a reason I voted for this guy.
You remember the guy they called Meat in high school? Well, let's just say my vagina remembers him now.
Also. When I die, I'm gonna have them put me in the casket naked and then have an open casket funeral. That will be my last chance to make people uncomfortable.
Just laying in bed, snuggling my cat, and pondering whether I'd like to attend a swingers party this evening...
What's an appropriate gift to bring to my boyfriend's wife's baby shower?
Shame?
Randomize
