There are few people I can ask this w/o being looked at as insane... Do you ever some days get fascinated by how amazing your own breast look?
I asked him where the store BJ's was and he unzipped his pants.
her moans were so awkward that i kept asking "what" when she'd say my name...
with your flexibility, and the size of my penis, amazing things are possible.
Not going out tonight. And so the 25 day drinking streak ends....
craigslist free llama. are you in or are you in?
I have no valid justification for peeing in your kitchen, but I don't think it's worth breaking up over.
Please delete that video of me blowing you. I will repay you with 100 blowjobs even better than the one I gave you during that video. Please. I am gonna be a grandma one day.
Triple a is towing cars for free tonight and tomorrow night. Can we take advantage of this ?
i got her number while she was sitting next to her boyfriend. her actual number. i might be a superhero
I'm going home because your Crackraptor step-brother tried getting his nasty meat hawks in my pants last night.
If a treadmill opens up I'll run next to him and then fall off so he has to give me mouth to mouth
like, you weren't just lying there, you were wrapped in what appeared to be the skin of a wolf, chanting doomsday prophecies
THE END IS NEIGH
I will teach you the ways of the ho life, my little gay grasshopper.
If it makes you feel better he's in the stall next to me and I'm taking a diabolical shit. He's complaining
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