My only options right now are Herpes, Gay, or Vanilla.
Can I use cash for clunkers to trade in her boobs for a new set of 18 year old tits?
Its worth a shot.
you have to choose: penises or morals?
his dad told me thanks for making his little boy a man at breakfast this morning
is 69 when you're sideways or up & down? I was on my back & confused.
Just seen a scantily clad pirate with 2 36 packs of natty ice on a bike riding with no hands. If she doesn't hit a speed bump she's golden and should be on the next Americas got talent.
some drunk guy just paid $3 for each cig that i picked up off the ground. the cigs that he threw on the ground. I might just follow him the rest of the night
I just dropped off shoes at Mike's hotel. The chick he hooked up with last night stole his phone and shoes.
Oh I forgot to tell you that while you were in the bathroom last night I made friends with a gay man named Rodger from Venezuela and he kissed me cheek and told me I "knew how to shake my thing". From now on we go to the bathroom as a team.
I'm confused are we getting high or did someone actually die?
We were having sex in the gardens when the grounds keeper walked up on us. He gave me a thumbs up and walked away
Well... I got her number now... I think she is a dish best served drunk
So anyway, I'm just floating along life with my vibrator and low expectations.
That's just how I roll. I drink, then tell people I'm either not wearing underwear or I'm training to be a stripper.
Of course his mom thinks you're nice, she doesn't know you have sex for cheeseburgers
One time!! I like sex and food....
Randomize
