I'm too stoned for this. I'm Canadian.
Every time a guy reaches down to touch my vag, i feel really sorry for all the transgender girls who still have a penis there.
That's weird cause every time i feel a girls vag i feel way worse for all the guys who reached down there and got a penis.
it feels like theres a golf ball between my legs. the sex was totally worth it tho.
The night ended with a lot of tears and everyone singing along to Willenium
Stay Away From These 29 Online Dating Red Flags
Day two of taking my adderall. I just organized the pantry and alphabetized my dvds. I've missed my mind on drugs
Dude, we somehow need to leave discretely with the toilet brush.
we took turns throwing up in the kitchen sink last night...no i am not doing the dishes
the black eye was caused by a 12 year old girl in a vampire costume who punched you in the face after you aggresively screamed "TEAM JACOB!" in her face & howled at the moon...
Like if I don't roll around in my puke, the night will be a failure.
21 Rideshare Drivers Had to Drive These NSFW Passengers
The coffee from our coffee maker just hasn't tasted normal since we made Mac n cheese in it that one time....
For some reason there are two like 10 year old black girls crumping at the bar. I feel like I'm in a missy elliot video.
I'm also glad were at the point in our friendship where my vagina talking to you isn't weird
We had on the same team jersey so at the time it made sense to hook up.
There are two types of people in this world I don't trust: people who collect stamps, and people who don't drink
You need to get laid. You spent last night stumbling through the club pulling couples apart and telling them to leave room for Jesus.