so im watching realhousewives of jersey with my mom. she just said they werent really rich bc they were doing their own makeup.
Today's life lesson: fat girls should not wear tight miniskirts and vinyl leggings. This Forever 21 salesgirl is a hot mess.
I just withdrew $200 in ones. I think the teller knew what was up
i don't care what you say, the winery is open and 10am is NOT too early to go barrel tasting
I just want him to slap me with his dick and call it love
I honestly wish you had parked the car in the terminal garage and fucked me in the backseat but I guess I should be more forward
.......The other day I peed on him in the shower....he was trying to touch my boobs and I wanted my space.
Remember when we partied so hard that dude died and it cockblocked you hooking up with my sister?
I forgot that happened. That's the second dude that died on a vacation I've been on
I missed rounds this morning...my senior resident hooked me up to and IV and made me stay in the clinic because he said I didn't look presentable enough to walk around the hospital
Hey, I think I showed you a picture of my nephew while we were fucking last night. Sorry, I know it's weird, I just really love that kid. Again, sorry.
Should I be scared that after we hooked up she took antibiotics with Sailor Jerry's?!
Played never have I ever with high schoolers today. Needless to say they brought up threesomes so I had to make a judgement call and decided to not put my finger down
My mom added me on Snapchat which means I am officially done with Snapchat.
So, Kevin dropping me off at urgent care. Seems my tampon slipped out of reach. Even after he tried to get it out with some kitchen tongs.
I was fingering her and they busted into my room demanding to know who the best running back was, before I could say anything she moaned and said "Barry Sanders"
Randomize
