If i come over, it means nothing
if by 'bottleservice' you mean 'bringing beers in my purse' then yes, we are.
he just spelled fiance, "pheancie". I dont think he's ready to get married.
And with me just getting pulled over and you maxing your card out on tennis balls I don't know if we can afford it
he had me stop mid-blow job to make me use my phone to id a song on the radio..
i wasnt really sure how to responde to that.
Are you still crying. What are you doing. Have 10 shots of tequila.
A girl just asked me if we had pregnancy tests and a coworker had to stop me from telling her I was a pregnancy test. THAT is why I don't drink at work.
So what exactly does one do when my driver gets a DUI and is now arrested and I'm still hiding in the trunk?
It's a whole movie about Joseph Gordon-Levitt watching porn and having sex... I NEED to own it..
Because my vagina is Ellis Island. All foreign penises must be presented for inspection and competency. God bless America.
this is an emotional support booty call
Dude, my vagina feels like new again! I love antibiotics. How's your day?
Does having sex in an airport bathroom with a girl you just met at the bar count as the mile high club? ...no?
color coded lube a great way to organize my bootie calls
You should not be involved with someone who smells like that. Because that smell seriously does not go away. Even if you can't actually smell it at any given point, it will still haunt you
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