Found a waterbottle filled with a bloody mary in my purse this morning. Blacked-out me is always trying to help hungover me, it's so cute.
you were chalanging people to drink the "worlds biggest jager bomb" - a VASE of Redbull and a PINT of Jager... is it no wonder you dont remember anything?
Pretending to care to care about playoffs in exchange for free shots. I'm sorry in advance.
It's 8 am and he's already trying to get me to make out with a girl.
oh great, iTunes now thinks im gay.
The one from last night got me a whole floor of Eskimo Brothers. There was a celebration of high fiving as I left
we decided to do a scavenge hunt for ourself for when we walked back to our apartments. We hid taco bell behind some bushes. I think they are still good.
We ran out of ice cubes so I used ice cream. Everyone thought that was the plan all along. I just went with it.
He ripped off his shirt and tried to give me CPR. That damn bong.
Dude in front of me just jumped out of line at Starbucks to go puke. Vegas in prime form.
I made a blanket fort and am drinking Gatorade and eating donuts watching 500 days of summer. I can't keep spending my saturdays like this.
Let's go. I'm waiting for my time to shine among the stars of never never land. Make sure you bring my Peter Pan costume this time. Shit's bout to get real glittery.
Wow this just keeps getting better, weed, shrooms, a stripper..........a gun.
I'm having to shit out rocks
Sorry dude, one minute I was flirting with a bachelorette party from Dallas and the next I’m being tied to the bed by the bride
Trying to wrangle us an invite to the wedding
Randomize
