She called it mighty mouse.. And from there it was down hill
I swear god or herbie drove my car home
I'm on the bus and the homeless person in the seat to my left is jacking off to a cartoon picture he found. He's now cleaning up with mitten I dropped.
I feel like someone was just looking at my memory and took out an eraser and was like "nope he doesnt need that"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
And just when I was about to fall asleep, he hit me in the face, and claimed he's a "violent sleeper".
At this point I just want to meet a man with a job.
Just found a peacock feather in my car. Should I be the least bit concerned about this?
please tell me why my pillow is wearing your thong...
...i wondered where i left that...
If anyone ask I'm rushing for brotherhood, not so that this bartender will suck my dick
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
ecstacy + fleshlight = not all that upset about being newly single anymore
Sorry, I was trapped in a small closet behind a washer. What's up?
Diet Starts Tomorrow! Guy from McDonalds asked if I got a new car...
Just saw the mall santa roll by on a rascal scooter holding a chic-fil-a milkshake and stop to chat up trio of cute 20-somethings. New hero.
Morning fuck and a coffee. ARE YOU READY TO CONQUER THE GALAXY WITH ME??
You know he wants it bad when he starts going door to door for condoms.
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