i just saw a midget buying condoms and graham crackers. i wonder which was the impluse buy.
I drew a venn diagram at the top of my final comparing stuff i know and stuff on the test.
Her parties are sponsored by Valtrex. This might not be your best idea.
If you're trying to subtly tell me that I look like Connie Chung, just stop it. I already know.
btw when he was trying to sleep i was apparently poking him in the face w my 'flipper' slurring random manatee facts
He like walks around to open car doors for me. Has already held my hair while I barf and still likes me. What. Is. Happening.
We should tie ourselves together anytime there is any type of alcohol involved. It's the safest way. I either end up with freshmen or weird ex bfs. You end up with a large cowboy. This is not good for us
You made out with a guy who refers to his cock as "rafiki." Are you proud of yourself?
U can be a future sentaor's wife if you want. I'm happy with "closet lesbian", "tech prof".and "masters degree" all rolled into one. Drunken bar escapades pay off.
You are my best friend, but sometimes best friends need to punch each other in the face
but you were the sluttiest panda there and you need to embrace it
New drinking game idea: Take a shot for every republican you see on facebook bitching about the ruling.
No we didn't fuck. He picked me up I asked where we were going and he said "I don't know if you've ever heard of a little place called Denny's?" He was completely serious. I told him to stop the car and I got out and called Jack.
not being a booty call is very strange. Who knew there was so much time for activities at night!
I'm not gonna plow a chick in front of her 14 year old brother....
Randomize
