It feels like I shit a light bulb that shattered on the way out.
she has over 3,000 tagged photos on facebook. dont tell me she isnt annoying.
She bought a fucking hedgehog. And that's just the tip of the crazy iceberg.
The fact that I pulled something plastic out of my mouth after taking that shot is starting to concern me.
These 23 People Walked In On Someone And Saw Some Crazy Sh*t
Call me when you get off. I have stories about black lesbians in jail begging to braid my hair...
IF HE CAN'T EVEN MAKE EYE CONTACT IN CLASS, I DOUBT THERE WILL BE OTHER FORMS OF CONTACT ON OUR FIRST NOT-A-DATE DATE
All I know is that your reaction after this date with him was "I think I did cocaine" so I'm sold on this boy
This is what happens when you live with someone you met on Grindr
I may have to marry her. She is smarter than me and has a six figure job and doesn't want to have kids. All I have to be is a trophy husband.
Confessions From 23 People Who Have Been Hiding Terrible Secrets
College: when you wake up drunk without pants and wearing a Cosby sweater
I don't know whether to laugh it off or be pissed at him..I got pulled over this morning leaving his place and the officer thought my hickeys were hand prints around my neck and asked if I needed to be escorted out of town.
You told the guy in Wawa you needed his hoagie for "a scavenger hunt" and then called him a "fuckstained Muggle" when he didn't give it to you. You are a delight.
he's a ginger AND was born with 2 holes in his penis. sleeping with a rare species & I LOVE THE THRILL
You were drunk at 5 You went to the dining hall and cried because your brain and fingers weren't working. Your RA came up to you and suddenly you became sober. I was very proud of you.
I am the oldest one here and I STILL feel like I need an adult. help.