Ambien does the same to me. One time that I took it, I got this huge bowl of spaghetti out of the fridge and thought it was a castle and that the meatballs were little slaves. I ate all of them first and then the noodles were the soldiers and the sauce was the water in the moat. And when I finished, I fell up the stairs and threw it all up.
I puked off the balcony.
Not horrible
Into the hottub. There were six people in it. I had eaten all their pizza.
just used a blowie as payment for him having to take the dog out to let her poop.
It was not a dingleberry, it was a dinglemelon
Just made everyone at my party download the vuvuzela app for iPhone, the neighbors absolutely HATE us
Turns out shot glasses hold the perfect serving of sour patch kids....I still fail to see how not having any real glasses is an issue
She passed out on top of the bar. Still did body shots off her.
Hey can we break in your window? We need to borrow the dog.
Yesterdays boozy weather forecast has been extended to today
I have better things to do with my life than be faithful.
Wow my largely unnecessary pool of lizard-related knowledge finally came in handy. Are you proud?
I don't know what to say
Can we talk about the fact that a stranger is doing a line of coke off our living room table right now?
Meeting up with one of your students at your drug dealers house is always an awkward moment
I just watched my high school guidance counselor pee in the backyard of this party.
This girls ass literally just fell out of her jeans in front on me on the escalator. Going commando on a Monday morning is a bold move.
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