do you think he would believe thats it not really my period, and that i ate a lot of licorice?
today is the best snowday of my entire life. also its no shirt day.
you're single. I'm single. let's spend vday with the 3 most important men in our lives: ben, jerry, and josé
i'm as serious about my hair as jesse from full house.
that is uncle jesse to you, show some respect.
I truly don't know anything about sober relationships. Normally I would just drunkenly yell "sex?" in a guy's face. What do I do now? Be like, sooo uhhh, wanna do it? Awkward, and even worse, I will remember clearly just how awkward it was.
There is a mosh pit in our kitchen. You better hurry.
When they say "all expenses paid" does that include bail?
She is high at the bar - she thinks the bottle of frangelico is aunt jemima telling her to stop doing drugs.
i think we should start 2012 by becoming clean and sober for awhile and buckle down
ppsyche im wasted where are you
My fridge broke, and apparently the back is missing. The repair guy just fixed it with a pizza box. I didn't ask where the box came from, but it wasn't mine. Reason #20 why rent is cheap.
I realized after pounding back 151 and head banging into each other to "the drop" of that dub step song, that we weren't meant to have boyfriends at this point in time.
My mom just covered me while I peed in the street. I love her. i also love parents weekend.
I'm just so happy. I go to sleep and when I wake up there will be chocolate milk and penis.
I feel like I just did it with Buster from Arrested Development. Taking a shower. #winefail
I have hobbies that aren't destroying myself and others...i can make hats.....
Randomize
