chris hansen is no longer pursuing child predators.let's celebrate
i'll bring the hard lemonade and lube
Nothing ended up happening last night because he couldn't get my overalls or fanny pack off. I woke up this morning with one strap over my overall shorts on, my fanny pack wrapped around my chest, and the baby doll still tied to my hand. Ugh white trash parties!
Barsexuality is the new black.
i realized that the internet ruins the joy of a father passing down playboys to his son
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I just got my poem back from the prof, there's a sticker of a girraffe on it and it says "you're awesome!" ... How can this even be considered real college?!?
You need an intervention. You fell into traffic walking home.
Not really. Birthday weekend. Totally jusifiable. Besides I didn't get hit. No harm no foul.
This guy punched out a light, puked in the sink, stole the mailbox, then tried to tell ME that I had to leave the party... Then his dog shit on the floor.
wellllllll.... I literally just puked in my mouth so perhaps this is not the epic love connection I believed it to be 3 minutes ago.
James is trying to butt-heads with a moose. I don't know whether I should stop him or just sit back and watch where this goes.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm just saying; the box truck will cost less then dorms or rent, and we can always crash where the party is.
Plus my dignity needs a night alone with me.... Oh that's right. I lost it last night
My idiot ex texted me on Valentine's day to tell me I was right, he did need a therapist.
Girl i am always here for you. But i am going to have sex now so im going to call you in the morning.
i just ran butt naked down the hall and someone highfived me. i love college.
I'm not drunk or hungover and I don't have to work. My body is sooo confused!
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