No awkward lesbian experiences without me
The girl next to me in class is taking notes on woman's suffrage with a girls gone wild pen.
Shit. Come in my room. Bring a trashcan and an icepack
It's nice to see a girl prepared for the walk of shame. She brought headphones
There are taser marks on me. Your face flashed before my eyes when i woke up and saw them.
Haha its ok. When we got back you sat in the car and attempted to tell me in sign language you were blacked out lol
Just caught my dad doing coke in my bathroom again. Guess whose getting a new car for christmasss.
She face-timed me on the toilet. My dick is never going to recover from that.
I AM THERE IN SPIRIT, TICKLING YOUR BALLS
I am stoned and listening to the Olympics music I downloaded on Saturday. Best 6 dollars I have ever spent.
I may be bringing home two guys tonight. I'f they won't go for a double-team you can have the lanky one.
If I end up in a healthy relationship because of this, I will NEVER forgive you!!!
I hate that we are older than the real world people now
He found his first fuckbuddy I'm so proud I feel like making him a card or something
I just started an apology with "so I'm sorry about throwing the Brita at your head last night..."
Randomize
