Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(504): View more from Louisiana

Penelope Cruz needs to learn American words.

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(559): View more from California

We can get Dustin to help us. I think he'd be good at luring girls into a dark alley.

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(214): View more from Texas

We're like two naked peas in a sex pod.

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(717): View more from Pennsylvania

and then he said that the only reasonable explanation as to why I got swine flu was because all I ever do is join the bandwagon

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(717): View more from Pennsylvania

He started making shapes and faces with his cock and balls.... apparently if you wrap the shaft with your balls and turn it 90 degrees to the left it looks like a hamburger

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(501): View more from Arkansas

Hookup with hot guy from gym, check. Wake up to find he's peed in my closet, double check.

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(337): View more from Louisiana

Second wind. Either that or my heart is about to explode. I'm hoping the first one.

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(765): View more from Indiana

This is like a walk of shame down memory lane.

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(951): View more from California

Bro I rebuilt the dungeon in animal crossing visit me

(951): View more from California

Broooo

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