rhymes with "ouble enetration"
What about the words "You're my personal dildo" made him say "I love you"?
week 6 of class: i have yet to go to spanish sober. i love being THAT girl.
so sad. i just ate the last good 'n' plenty out of the bottom of my purse.
if you hear someone banging on your door early in the morning, it's me with some breakfast burritos, so don't be alarmed
All she was asking was for you to describe your coat so she could get it, but you kept yelling at her so the security threw you out.
I think i just fucked the same guy a second time without realizing it....does that make me a good whore or a bad whore???
I told my dad my stomach hurt and he bet me ten bucks I couldn't throw up on command. He has no idea what I did last night and I got ten bucks.
i refuse to hook up with a girl that looks like drew carey.
I didn't get a chance to take any pics but the mental snapshot of her boyfriend calling her directly after we finished was a really special moment I wish I could properly share with you.
I wanted to make fun of someone saying that to an untrained ear, skrillex is blah blah blah. But it was too soon after they said it. And now I can't find it. These are real problems.
So that advice that humming stops you from puking? Yeah no, just puked through my nose.
And I must've sleep walked to the fridge cause when I woke up, there I was, balls deep in a fudge pop.
I had to replace her wine with red vitamin water. So if she’s alive, you can thank me
I just snorted sandwich everywhere.
I hope it smells nice :)
IT DOESN'T BECAUSE I HAVE MEAT COMING OUT OF MY NOSE, DAMNIT.
Randomize