You know, I didn't realize this at the time, but it appears that I am being "heavily petted" by 3 grown men in that pic.
If these were biblical times then you'd be a Roman Senator.
is it wrong that i woudl like to tie u down to the baby changing station using the straps provided?
My RA tried to compliment my pong tables design after he confiscated it
Theres a baby at this concert double fisting pacifiers. shes gunna do great in college.
Pregnant only lasts nine months, being hot takes way longer to go away. So yes, I will continue to hit on the hot pregnant girl.
She's grinding on a deaf black man and I'm the interpreter.
Well sorry I accidentally spooned your mom and possibly threw up on you
Now back to adults eating hotdogs.
And I'm still awake, and you left me. Like the guy on Jurassic Park, that jumped out of the car expecting me to save myself while there is a man eating T-rex ready to tear my ass apart except theres a mathematician and paleontologist there to save me because they are bad asses.
Embrace your curves. Cuz we're too poor for a coke habit.
I'm gonna have to shit in a bar again tonight
Do me a favor and don't mention him I feel like Regina George and I just want to scream I made him
He's a cop. Do you know how many times I've said fuck the police? This is my chance. I'm taking it.
She sent me a thank you card for not fucking her boyfriend...
I got paid to fuck my boss for lunch. My job is better than yours.
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