How many times do you have to sleep with a guy before you get him to kiss you???
So it's like pop-o-matic trouble, but with penises
He broke up with me by playing Lynyrd Skynyrd "Free Bird".
Honestly, where the fuck is osama bin laden?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Watching that soccer game was like getting kicked in the crotch for an hour and half and then coming right at the end.
I woke up with a new Tiffanys necklace on. I'm such a classy drunk.
I'm love that we're talking about a possible 3rd 3some, and that you're going to be a dad.
Called my dealer in tears and we talked for an hour until I felt better. That's the way it should be.
You have a roommate and cry when you see my dick
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He's claiming he can open a beer bottle with anything. He's been trying for a while now with a power rangers action figure and he is just cutting the hell out of his hand. There is blood all over billy
Get this. He's a red head and he works at country oven bakery. He will forever be known as the gingerbread man.
You are cordially invited to an I'm not pregnant laser tag celebration tomorrow. booze is optional.
All I know is if i get a free preview weekend of HBO then I am recording Kindergarten Cop.
I think you're overestimating how drunk I was
You said your pillow felt like the ocean...
It’s only loud for those who wanna get loud. The bowlers are protected.
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