I'm saving my limes so I'll know how many drinks I've had.
I do the same thing, but I use ice cubes.
so he came over for the first time and i completely forgot i had pictures of him printed out from facebook on my wall and a newspaper article with him in it.. you can guess that it lead for an awkward situation.
I've never had a woman show me her venereal disease results in a bar before.
just heard this guy tell a story about how he got boat head. i want his life
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
making out was so insane. it felt like our tongues were paintbrushes made of waves and we were painting an ocean galazy
He came when he saw that my nipples were pieced
I'm pretty sure I'm the first person in the history of this college to rollerblade their walk of shame.
dude there's a blind guy on the trail using his service dog to hit on girls.
Ran out of deodorant. Febreze on a paper towel? Kicking college's ass.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I asked her if she could eat some Doritos so when we made out it would taste awesome
If you get laid dressed as my dad that makes me extremely uncomfortable
How's my sex life is me mastubating next to her dog. that's how it's going.
Conversations really do change when your social worker had your dick in her mouth the other night.
IM FILLED WITH SANDWICHES AND SELF LOATHING
i woke up between my boyfriend and his sister and i don't know if we fucked or cried together
Randomize