He was so drunk that he tried to backflip off a baby chair.. How do you think that ended?
you definitely made a grilled cheese using your iron..
ya and it worked didnt it??
you walked into the kitchen holding the skyy bottle and asked us "how do i warm this?"
Whoa. I woke up to 10 new text messages. All about bacon.
No, the sea-green pills were klonopin, the bright blue ones are adderall. you're probably going to have to adjust your plans for the day.
I found out you can't leave the bar with a drink. I also found out that pouring it on the bouncers shoes is also unacceptable.
It summer and it's getting a lot harder to hide sex bruises from my parents.
First world problems?
Rainbow fish was a wild success, got wasted at 6 gave away most my scales and made out with max from where the wild things are.You'd be so proud
So I just went to 3 different stores because there is no way I can walk out of one store with this many reeses and still have my pride.
Prob because you've thrown up alot. As long as its not like pure blood you're fine. Drink water.
I found a guy who will take me to the Olive Garden and he is CONVENTIONALLY ATTRACTIVE.
You should come over tomorrow. Wine, pizza and my vagina. Those are all great things.
just called AAA to get my keys out of me car and then afterwards realized they were in my pocket...stoner life
I used your vibrator when you were out of town. Now I know why you always come out of your room smiling.
At least he's enough of a gentleman to not make me do the walk of shame dressed as Santa.
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