Remember when I use to call my dick 'the pendulum'
wtf?
It is now the artist formerly known as 'insideyourgirlfriend'
even through the webcam i could tell he was aiming for my face/hair
You told her the u were going to wrap your dick around her neck and start her like a lawn mower. thats why she left.
Karaoke into a bottle of boones. dear summer in alabama, glad to see you again.
can you explain how you are here for one night and now my kitchen table is in 11 pieces..
You were rubbing sand all over yourself and everyone else and claiming you were "EXFOLIATING."
Do you know who the random guy who just walked in to kiss me goodnight is?
As the night goes on these shots are getting so much easier. My liver jst needed a warmup lap.
Traded my phone for pizza, then got it back this morning....successful night
Y'all best leave this "I can only have a couple drinks" shit at the door. U don't drive to Yukon to have a shot. I'm getting u fuckers drunk.
Your vase full of piss was still at his house and he still doesn't know.
I just can't even fathom the crazy and I work at a mental hospital.
She wasn't one for labels or anything serious really but while she was riding me she yelled marry me. It's like she fucked her self into commitment lmao she realy is a keeper bro
Tip: never mention Guy Fieri during sex
I tried to cut you?! I'm sorry! PS where's my hair?
Randomize
