therell be strippers and coke right?
no strippers. just coke.
i hate this fuckin recession
all we ever talk about is how much i like your dick or my drug problem.
is not sure whether or not everyone at the club last night calling me a-easy is a good thing?
I'll just dance on top of the ping pong table, and if it's stable enough for that, then it's stable enough for sex
I'm currently making some changes in my life. If you don't hear from me anymore, then you're probably one of them. Or I'm dead.
Those were the days I had no morals... Dark times.
Shall we take a trip back?
I woke up because a stranger was shoving an already lit bowl into my mouth. Spring break is awesome
They gave me patron and potatoes I couldn't say no
Please tell me that SOMEONE, SOMEWHERE, has created a drink called a 'Tequila Mockingbird'. PLEASE.
I'm not THAT invested in seeing you to an orgasm
Stoned stonnnnnnned on the raaaaange
Dude, I can't even reach my asshole to wipe it. I have a lot more to be thankful for this Thanksgiving.
I can't help you there
There is a reason my most meaningful relationship since 2012 has been with Duracel...
I said, hypothetically speaking, if I was going to be having some rough sex Friday night, when WOULD be the best time for a massage, mother dear?
Third time this week I've caught co workers dry humping. Quarantine really changes people's priorities.
Randomize
