I've been emailing with a woman. I don't think she's into me, but we've become sorta email buddies. I'm hoping to meet her because on her profile she states she's into 'fisting.' Frankly the thought kinda freaks me out but I'm dying to see what kind of woman is 1) into that and 2) admits it upfront.
I've replaced the bottom of the food pyramid with alcohol.
Definitely just blazed with the housekeeper. That woman needs a raise
Please do NOT set off the smoke alarm when I am tied to the bed like this...
Nope. Can't afford girlfriends. Still looking for the 25 year old bisexual tripled who owns a brewery or a casino.. the search continues....
Dude he's not responding... I'll take that as an unpleasant visit to the clinic
No, trust me. Falling down the stairs is a fucking sobering experience.
Don't make it weird, I don't think about you when I'm climaxing, it's just that I see you rooting me on.
HIS TAN HAS PUT ME TO SHAME. HE TOOK HIS PANTS OFF AND HIS DICK LOOKED LIKE A GHOST
He said, "cum on daddy's dick!" ... I pictured my dad. That just scarred me for life.
You have set the bar insurmountably high with apple pie and buttsex.
There's only two more days left to say you saw me naked this year.....I'll bring the booze, you got all of next year to rationalize why.
In hindsight, I probably should not have let the waiter give me a chiropractic adjustment on my neck last night.
WELL I DIDNT KNOW IT WAS POSSIBLE TO COME SO HARD YOU HAVE AN ASTHMA ATTACK BUT HERE I AM
She said my penis was powerful and magnificent
Randomize
