I can't get in trouble, i'm smoking a bong in the office right now
I think, one-on-one, Paul Rudd could be very threatening in like a REALLY good way.
She thought I was gay, so I told her I'd be more comfortable with anal. She agreed.
Yeah! I got cockblocked by the blizzard last night. Lost girl on way to my apartment. Not a joke
I thought I hit my peak drinking in college. Just finished first day on Wall Street. College was nothing.
then you said,"Take this damn cabbage!" although it was actually your shirt. i found you in the elevator of his building.
We legit stopped the the game so that Jamie and I could throw up in the bushes, and then continue to play intramurals... this is what my life is coming to1
Dude she said she'd let me snort a line off her ass now I just have to wait for them to break up
Well tech shes born nov 12, but since her head was out on the 11th, she claims both days as her birthday
I'm going to start referring to my liver is Livy. I feel like if I give it an affectionate nickname it will hate me less. Livy isn't ready for syllabus week.
I think we all know your liver needs a man's name.
I don't send those kind of pictures unless the recipient has already been up close and personal with it. I don't give previews, but I will provide recaps.
Soggy bong water carpet is the worst kind of carpet.
It was only in the sobering silence of the wilderness on the mountain, after I was too tired to talk anymore and I also didn't want to tell Julian that we were lost, that I realized how super tripped out I had been the entire time...
My stripper pole led lights flash with the sound so it's awsome with music
Only I could go on a date with one guy, have a beer with a different guy and go home with the guy im trying to avoid. I have a talent or a problem.
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