i finally understand why guys leave in the middle of the night.......they got it right
My boss just told me $1,000 at a six hour event wouldn't be worth her time. She makes $70k a yr. and apparently never learned multiplication.
normally I beat off every night before I go to bed even though my little brother sleeps in the same room. So I was starting to last night, and he jumped out of bed and said "Fuck, Im not listening to this shit again" We havent talked since. fuck me
Dude, Her having kids just means she puts out.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
so my 6 year old came home from school and asked me if he was a bastard cause the kids at school called him one, i told him to call them a clit. those parents will hate me
her tits were misleading. turns out she wasn't cool, smart and funny
Bring your kids so they can distract our kids so we can drink beer in peace.
I need to stop fucking people before I get to know them
She just took the bottle of jager to the bathroom and locked the door. Now I hear the water running..if the house floods she's paying for it
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She's grinding on a deaf black man and I'm the interpreter.
I fucked your brother... Hey, at least we know he is not gay... You're welcome.
Btw his name is Woody. I must be really drunk to think this is a good situation
So apparently having sex with your co-worker in the bathroom at the staff party can get you fired.
I baked a frozen pizza completely, put it back in the plastic and box, and put it back in the freezer. THAT drunk.
Sometimes being bisexual is a curse. Turns out I banged both of her older twin brothers last summer.
Randomize