AIM automatically accepts video chats on my laptop. I found this out when I got a text from Jacob after my first attempt at drunk lesbian sex saying, "I'd give it a 7. You need to work on your positioning." I think I'm single now.
Just got booed while taking a piss and asked if I 'call that a penis.' Get me the fuck out nf yankee stadium.
we have officially mastered the walk of shame
i swear to god her finding her clit was like looking for a sock in a dryer full of beach towels
Please come to History lecture. The kid two seats over is belligerently drunk.
Seriously. You just grinded your ass all over the heisman trophy's dick. I want you to think about that.
Its 4 am and he honestly tried throwing pizza at his ceiling for decorations
I just watched a girl in the library pull a vodka bottle out of her bag. I think I'm going to give her my number.
security doesn't like it when we pee on cars. or maybe just not theirs?
Took 45 minutes to masturbate. Fuck you Zoloft. I'm never gonna be diagnosed with depression again
That's not a current picture, because if you look deep enough into my eyes you can still see morals. Not these days.
btw my frat has a search out for you. the "girl who threw up in the middle of the party" but it was on some fat girls. so thank you.
Remember that time we turned a can of Axe body spray into a flame thrower?
What's more sad than going to Target to buy Plan B and the new Sam Smith album?
I walked in on him fucking her whilst she ate skittles. I saw things no one should see, but I did get your bra back. You owe me.
Randomize
