Well, its 5:30am and you haven't let me in, I guess ill go home
You ordered a "mcblizzard" and yelled @ the worker for false advertisement because she didn't flip your "mcblizzard" upsidedown. You wanted it free. I'd say mcdonalds daytime workers need to be trained in dealing with daytime drunks too. She didn't know what to do.
Your sister reminds me of me at her age. Stop her while you can.
There's a Sam Adams brew house. How were we not supposed to go
I remember sitting there at the toilet, bleeding everywhere and thinking, "I walked from my bedroom to here. What happened?"
You missed out on a serious adventure. Cops were called. We put a chicken in someones house.
The cop told me to answer for everyone if there was drinking involved and then i threw up in my Luigi's italian ice that i was eating with a pizza slicer
Well it's official, last night I hooked up with the third girl from the apartment downstairs.
Dude that's a hat trick!
I know, I tossed my hat on the floor as I was walking out.
So I've discovered that being hungover at 25 feels the same as being hungover at 24. Happy Birthday to me.
It was 16 hours of liver killing mistake making goodness
go for it girl, the world is ur dick oyster
Finally get to put my practical writing degree to use! I'm writing a craigslist ad for a threesome
wait i saw you last night?
we found you ass naked on the couch covered in pillows.
Dude how about today while I was on lunch someone died in the break room at work....I didn't even know we had a break room!!
It's a weird kind of sexy when a guy has a bunkbed with his roommate
Randomize