you probably should not have drank the wine that everyone spits out. and the sad part, that was not even your low point last night
you went around and groping mens pants to see "which was worthy" of you to go home with.
I am the drunkest girl in the tree.
i just overheard someone saying that they invented the 'tequila mockingbird' last night. sorry, but i found better friends
She told me that as long as she kept starring at the freckle on her arm she wouldnt throw up
I'm still waiting for my blazer that I left at your apartment, you owe me a blowjob for every day from Thursday on that it's late.
I came in your room, you looked at me and said "I fucked up" and then some kid showed up and took you to the hospital
Option 1: fuck me and bedtime. Option 2: come fuck me and then hangout with everyone. Option 3: don't fuck me in which case fuck you.
Well I guess I'll go shower now and wash all the stripper off.
So I'm pretty sure I told every one at the party that "I'm going to fuck my pillow pets tonight?"
I'm going to give you the best blowjob of your life. And yes you can use my mom's printer.
Seriously, he's as bad as Joffrey. I hope this ends like Game Of Thrones did.
I had to give myself a suppository. That was the LEAST fun I've had inserting things in my ass.
dude. I can hear the air.
I literally ended up in this basement and was tangoing w my friend and then I peed in a supply closet and had to be put to bed
Randomize
