i just google searched 'can you pop your ovary'
road dome is illegal, just asked in driving school.
yeah so our basement was flooded 4 feet. we just smoke and drank and then went swimming. gotta make the best out of it
He just called shotgun on the way to the squad car.
Im only pretending to be his friend so I can sleep with his girlfriend.
Well I'm currently debating between getting toilet paper or getting my eyebrows waxed so... There's that
My boob is missing a layer of skin
I need to be put in a corner surrounded by pamphlets of stds and babies
You came out in nothing but lingerie and a Jedi robe claiming you needed more of those baby hot dog things or you were gonna go all Sith on us
Well I want to be mistreated and called a slut and finger banged
But I guess hugs would be nice
I'm using emojis for drug deals now. It's time to kill me.
i got a dick pic last night and the mother fucker had a Jesus picture in the background.
YOU UNCULTURED BADGER
when i was on the highway she passed out and knocked my transmission into nuetral with her forehead...that was an experience
I mean, who hasn’t been fingered in there back of an Uber?
Randomize
