am i at home because theres a dig starrrrring at me and i dont know wit plus i haer sirens. run fast.
Small dicks are the new regular sized dicks.
so high. i feel like my whole body is a boner
Spotted at kelly concert- 10 year old in a homemade "I do not hook up" t shirt. Well I should certainly hope not, sweetheart.
all i need in life is blowjobs and white cheddar cheezits
I don't understand or I understand perfect - if were not talking about fried chicken I'm not sure what's happening.
hey if you're going to the hospital do you wanna pick me up a taco on your way back
Is she okay?
She may want to issue revenge punches, but medically fine.
Hey the moment you step into my house, find me IMMEDIATELY so we can pinky promise on not roping anyone at the party into yet another threesome
:(. i have vodka in a fire extinguisher. that solves all problems. except fires. it would actually make that worse.
this dude is way too smart. he just explained to me the different scientific components of drugs while we smoked. i said i loved icecream.
Literally been in their house 5 minutes and I've projectile vomited all over the bathroom wall. The dog licked it up though so I think it's cool.
I just gave my boss a blowjob. underneath his desk at work. that promotion is mine!
The best part of being a lesbian? If I'm late for work at a hookup's place I can use her make up and peace out. Well and all the sex of course.
If you wear a peguin suit you MUST send me a picture!!!
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