My family just had an in depth argument about the meaning of chodes
Today should be called shooting fish in a barrel day. Every place ive gone to ive met a girl who regrets not hooking up last night. There have not been girls this easy since Fathers Day
you were making out, puked over his shoulder and insisted everything was okay
He pulled his dick out during the Bourne Ultimatum, ruined it for me.
My relaxing drive may end up as a surprise bootycall in Pittsburgh. Don't try to stop me.
There's a warrant out for his arrest for throwing a mannequin through a bus stop.
I think being an adult is being able to say no to free shots...I need to work on that.
i swear, you were born with a blunt in one hand and somebody else's wallet in the other.
Dude. When are you coming home? I'm laying in bed watching the Grinch and trying to pet a cat that I'm not even sure exists.
BTW, you ever shave a dick into my dog, I'll cut you. I'll laugh first, but then I'll cut you
How do I ask where the Jello shot cups are at Walmart without sounding like white trash?
It would be magical, all 2 min of it.
Damn him and his beautiful face and body and penis.
He's such a jerk. If only his penis was attached to someone else
this bedazzled flask is my best investment yet
Randomize
